I am watching myself, my fast intakes of breath. Yet it is clear that it is not finished. I say it must be dream within a dream when I am sliding fast into another dimension.
I am in a cave. There is someone who sits with his legs crossed yet I cannot see his face. How interesting for the light to reflect only on him. However, everywhere else is dark.
He lifts up his head. I only see those magnificent blue eyes. The owner of the blue eyes that I always wait for, lost and would never come, is right in front of me.
‘I was waiting for you’ he says.
‘Where are you? Where have you been?’ I say
He answers with his magnificent voice, with a thousand sparkles in his blue eyes. ‘I am with you! Always with you!’
‘The ones who are continuously and always in the heart know themselves very well,’ he says.
‘But I, I couldn’t know, I couldn’t see, I always waited. You were in my dreams and you still are.’ I say.
‘Because you could not completely surrender. That’s why you were waiting. Expectation is only for those who cannot surrender. For those who know there is no expectation.
And you the beautiful traveller! Do you still think all this is a dream!’
‘For one to leave the beyond and unify with me is an expectation and is wrong; he either exists next to you or he doesn’t. If he is not with you then that love is not deserved. If there are details then it is a relationship of interest not true love. Not every single detail brings love with itself,’ he says.
I am dreaming but I wake up. I wake up! Now I know I am me who knows everything but in fact knows nothing. It is as if the whole energy of uniting with me that is not me, fills my self and then my soul from there. All particles of my soul are injected with knowledge.
‘You were laying in the depths of my heart. You woke up, I was awakened. I didn’t know, I knew. There the One is! I found the One! The lost One! He was here and with me since the beginning, He didn’t leave me alone, He came by abandoning the beyond. Abandoning, was it separate, was it detached?
The One is who tells the secrets. The one who finds the lost ones in each earth system and in each universe. I was lost. I was found. I was sought many times but I was found!
I was the seeker and I became the found one. The One is the owner of my spiritual heart, my soul and everything. Only the One! It is the One in which my self melts in its self even in disbelief! Only the One! It is the One, which leaves its seal in every particle that I see! It is the One, which I am in love with His every particle! It is the One for which I can sacrifice myself thousands, millions of times! It is the One in which I infinitely turn in His center! I am with Him and me. The One that breathes out is He, the one that enables breathing is He! Every exhale lost from the One, every breath in, full of the One.’
He loves us, the dough of creation is mixed with love, and we feel love for Him and His seal in every particle. Hence, the me that is not me is full of this Love. And the owner of the blue eyes in front of me is a reflection of my soul’s light. I feel love only for Him. And my mind is creating what is suitable for this.’
‘Pain and suffering, is the principle food at the spiritual table of the enlightened. And they do not hesitate even for one moment to eat it infinitely. Because, they surrendered completely.’ And now I understand these are the final words. Because I know what is in front is me, and I am what is in front. Our unification and becoming one is a matter of a moment.
It is a skill to see one’s soul from his eyes, and heart from his words.
‘The reality in the hidden plan is always a secret.’
And I own just that skill. I am not me, I stopped being me, I am uniting with the owner of the blue eyes across from me that I feel Love for. And his final words again unite as the words of I and his.
‘Love is with those who are in love with their essence.’
‘Everything that comes from the lover is again the lover and to the lover. There is no two. There is only One’
Now your light will shine. A field of attraction forms to the extent of the shining of your light. The field of attraction, this is the true secret. And human beings see their own reality and are pulled towards that light. Because, they are in love with themselves. What they see is not my beauty, not your handsomeness it is their lost beauty, they see their lost beauty that is far in that light, they fall in love, and become fond of that.’
‘To the real person, to their own Truth. Meaning their own reality.’
‘Once you see that truth, your life transforms, and you also transform, the cells do not get renewed, the cells do not change, the cells transform and become something else. They transform in a lost body, for someone who is lost.
I am coming back to myself while looking at the ceiling. I am waking up yes, but they don’t know. I wake up with a huge peacefulness. Because I Woke Up. I Woke Up!
Translated by Pınar Karaman Kaan / London / UK
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